Description
Okay, so I know calling a salad “crack” sounds dramatic, but hear me out. This cucumber ranch salad is straight-up addictive. Like, dangerously so. I made it for a BBQ last summer and people were literally scraping the bowl clean and asking for the recipe before they’d even finished chewing. It’s crispy, creamy, tangy, and somehow manages to be both refreshing AND indulgent at the same time. The secret? It’s all about that perfect balance of cool cucumbers, creamy ranch, and just enough crunch from some surprise ingredients that’ll make you question everything you thought you knew about salad. Fair warning: you might find yourself eating this straight from the fridge at midnight. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Ingredients
The Cucumber Situation:
- 4–5 large English cucumbers (the long skinny ones)
- 1 tsp salt (for drawing out water — trust the process)
The Ranch Magic:
- 1 cup mayonnaise (don’t go light — live a little)
- 1/2 cup sour cream
- 1 packet ranch dressing mix (Hidden Valley or bust)
- 2 tbsp apple cider vinegar
- 1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
- 1 tsp garlic powder
- 1/2 tsp onion powder
- Freshly cracked black pepper
The Crunch Factor:
- 1/2 red onion, thinly sliced
- 1/4 cup fresh dill, chopped (or 2 tbsp dried)
- 2 tbsp chives, chopped
- 1/4 cup sunflower seeds or chopped pecans (optional but recommended)
For Extra Credit:
- 4 oz crumbled feta or goat cheese
- 1/4 cup crispy bacon bits
- Everything bagel seasoning for sprinkling
Instructions
Wash and slice your cucumbers into rounds about 1/4 inch thick. You can peel them if you want, but the skin adds nice color and crunch. Toss the sliced cucumbers with salt in a large colander and let them sit for 15-20 minutes. This draws out excess water so your salad doesn’t get watery later.
While cucumbers are doing their thing, whisk together mayo, sour cream, ranch packet, apple cider vinegar, lemon juice, garlic powder, and onion powder in a large bowl. Taste and adjust — want it tangier? More vinegar. Want it richer? More mayo. This is YOUR salad.
After 15-20 minutes, rinse the cucumbers under cold water and pat them REALLY dry with paper towels or a clean kitchen towel. This step is crucial for maximum crunch.
Add the dried cucumbers to your ranch mixture along with the sliced red onion, dill, and chives. Fold everything together gently — you don’t want to bruise the cucumbers.
Here’s where patience pays off. Let this sit in the fridge for at least 30 minutes before serving. An hour is even better. The flavors need time to meld and become one beautiful, creamy, crunchy masterpiece.
Right before serving, add your sunflower seeds or nuts for crunch, crumbled cheese if using, and a generous sprinkle of freshly cracked black pepper. If you’re feeling fancy, hit it with some everything bagel seasoning.
Notes
This pairs perfectly with grilled anything — burgers, chicken, fish, you name it. It’s also incredible alongside pulled pork, at potluck dinners, or honestly just eaten with a fork while standing in your kitchen judging your life choices (no judgment here).
- Prep Time: 15 minutes
- Cook Time: 30 minutes
Nutrition
- Calories: ~180 kcal
- Fat: ~18g
- Carbohydrates: ~6g
- Protein: ~2g